Anatomy of a Murder Hotel

I really thought I was being mature.  I thought I was being an adult.  I opted to pay the $80 to stay close to the start line bus loading area so I didn’t have to drove an extra 30 minutes at 3 am.  I didn’t go cheap… and yet even when I try NOT to stay in a murder hotel, I wind up I’m a murder hotel.

When I first checked in, they gave me a smoking room… but I had qtitten confirmation to prove I reserved non-smoking… so this is the “improved” room tour…

Creepy hallway? Check.
Prison cell amenities? Check.
Duct taped for better a/c? Check.
Bullet holes? Maybe.
Nothing says classy like fixing the cigarette hole in the drapes by stuffing it with toilet paper.
Bonus – blotting out the peep hole so they can’t see in… and, ya know, you can’t see out.
Too right…
Oh, you wanted NON-HAUNTED?
If this had been room 237 I would’ve eaten the $80 bucks and slept in my car…

You know it must be bad when even *I* have reservations about my reservation.

And the real kicker?  I had to pay a $3 “check in fee” on top of my prepaid amount.  And sure enough, Priceline does say in the fine print that hotels may charge additional fees at check in, for example parking or a “resort fee.”

This ain’t no resort… but then again the fee is “unclud[ed]” [sic].

Wait… that was the check in fee… how much is it to check out?!